I'm one of those parents who has utterly fallen into the trap of running myself--and my three children--to exhaustion. It's not that everyone individually does too much; it's the activities times 3 that does us in. That's why this book was refreshing, reassuring, and sometimes frustrating to read and review. The described lifestyle definitely "fits" my family; the frustration comes from the knowledge that I'm overdoing it paired with my hesitation to fix the problems.
Play time IS Learning, Say Authors
Psychologists Kathy Hirsch-Pasek and Roberta Michnick Golinkoff urge parents to ease off the structured activities and formalized learning tools and allow them time to do one of life's best lessons: free time to just play. The authors explain that children need the unstructured time to discover their own creativity and strengths, and good ol' "play time" will help foster their development more than anything else possibly can. In other words, they urge that despite societal brain washing that kids need exposure a wide variety of activities to encourage their interests, the reality is that it "is okay to just play!"
Are Flash Cards, Brain Games, and Sensory Toys Really Necessary?
Chapter One talks about the plight of the modern parent, and I personally identified with the story of a first-time mom-to-be who became overwhelmed at the enrichment "must-have" baby equipment, including flash cards, video tapes, and books that promoted "fetal parenting" and "brain architecture." She left feeling overwhelmed and inadequate. And, who wouldn't? The pressure parents feel today for their kids to be brighter, quicker, learn to read sooner, and perform earlier seems to be taking its toll on parents and kids alike, and the authors promote that all these educational-focused products and activities are not only unnecessary, but in the end could delay some of the practical learning that children get from quality play time.
The Childhood Hustle Means No Time For Being Just A Kid
I really related to the authors' perspective on the childhood hustle and how ferrying kids from one "enriching" activity to another leaves little time for being a kid. The authors provide interesting data on rushed schedules and how this is now the norm instead of the exception. They cite the statistics that Americans are now working harder than almost inyone else in the world, including the Japanese, and how a survey of parents found that 25 percent said they had no time for family due to the demands of their jobs. The stats seem to point to a sad state of the overall health of American families everywhere.
When To Say When?
When
should a parent say "no more," and will there be a negative consequence as a result? The book's authors say no, and point to their own healthy, well-adjusted and successful children, who were not placed into the maze of extracurricular and organized activities. But, then, one also just has to look around at kids in their own neighborhood, and see future wanna-be soccer players, football jocks, dancers, cheerleaders, or Olympic-caliber gymnasts to wonder if that is the right decision either. The book does a good job of explaining to parents what is truly important with a child's development and growth, at least from the authors' perspective, and that in the end, children learn best by having some good ol' free time.
See next page for author advice on what parents SHOULD do for their kids.
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